Dear Mr. Wes Anderson…

Hi from Brooklyn!  So, this is a little awkward, but were you filming on the Queens-bound V train this morning between 34th and Fifth Avenue?  If you weren’t, would you care to explain the following?  Exhibit A:  40’ish male wearing a purple faux fur coat with a live parrot atop left shoulder.  Exhibit B:  Presumably homeless, train-dwelling man wearing a kilt asleep beside a Food City grocery cart overflowing with collected plastic flowers.  Exhibit C:  A group of 15 year-old uniformed female Korean foreign exchange students huddled around one comic book.  Exhibit D:  A man nibbling the poppy seeds off of a poppy seed bagel.  Just the poppy seeds.  Exhibit E:  A 30’ish male carrying a brief case and a sombrero.  I didn’t see anyone filming, so maybe it had nothing to do with you and was just a typical NYC a.m. rush-hour ride.  It is just that everyone was staged so perfectly.

Look, I would no sooner give you musical advice than I would Lisa Cholodenko or Martin Scorsese.  But, as I am pretty sure you weren’t involved, should you choose to use any of the aforementioned images, I highly recommend “Trouble” by The Jayhawks from Sound of Lies.  I had the good fortune to have been listening to the song on my noise-cancelling headphones the entire time, which definitely heightened the Andersonian experience.  Just as I disembarked at Fifth Ave., the chorus kicked in as I walked against traffic down the long platform to the 53rd Street exit (presumably with a long stride and in slow motion…just as you would have intended).  I mean no disrespect whatsoever to The Who, The Kinks, The Stones, protopunk or to both British Invasions, but it was really the perfect song.  You should check it out (I mean, if you feel like it).

Well, I guess that’s it.  Good luck and have a nice life!

Best, Foffee

p.s.  If you *do* use any of this, and if at all possible (not to be pushy), but could you consider maybe casting Charlotte Gainsbourg as me, Romain Duris as sombrero guy, RZA as parrot guy, Steve Coogan as bagel guy and Jim Jarmusch as the plastic flower collector?  I mean, again, I don’t mean to be giving you suggestions or anything, but that would be really cool.  Thanks!


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